Aysha Bowling

"Parenting and living with a chronic illness are definitely not a walk in the park. I am a stay at home mom of two boys ages 8yr and 4yr old’s and a business owner. I was diagnosed with Lupus in 2008 and had my first child in 2011. It was my mission to do all that I could to help my body go into remission so that I could effectively parent my children. I made it a priority to change my diet and incorporate more physical activity. It took some time, but I have been in remission for eight years and it has helped me to physically be present for my kids. I do have days that are challenging due to brain fog and fatigue. I have found that eating a clean food (less animal protein and dairy) and intentionally scheduling days of self-care helps me keep inflammation low. Most importantly it helps me to not miss important moments with me kids!"

Emmitt Henderson lll

“As a man with Lupus, parenting was somewhat a struggle. My son was seven years old and my daughter was four years old when I was diagnosed with SLE in 1995. At the time I was being the man of the house supporting my family financially. I had a lot on my plate as a young father and knew what I needed to do. The one thing I could not do was show weakness towards my wife and children. Lupus was extremely aggressive and forced me to go into the hospital quite often.

 When my children would ask "daddy what's wrong"? I would reply and say I was ok just had to stay in the hospital for a couple of days. I could not let my children down; it took everything in me to feel better so I could be there for my children. I made a promise to myself that, I would not let this illness stop me from attending birthday parties, school events or having any type of parent involvement. I sacrificed a lot to juggle this illness and being a fulltime father.

I remember one time when I was hospitalized, I told my doctors that I had to be discharged because I had to perform with my daughter at her piano recital. I did not think my doctor was going to discharged me, but he did, and I performed with my daughter being 30% operational.

 One other time I was supposed to take my son to a concert, but I had a flare up and was hospitalized. Again, I convinced the doctor to discharge me so I can take my son to the concert, and once again my doctor discharged me. There is nothing I would not do for my children but having an autoimmune disease like lupus, does not make it easy. One of the worst feelings is having my children see me in the hospital when it really gets bad. They knew how strong I was, to see me weak in bed, tubes going in was scary for them. I had to sit both down numerous of times to explain to them this is what daddy must do to feel better. As my children get older, it has become a routinely thing to see me going through pain but they both are strong has adjusted to what I am going through, my children are my biggest supporters to this very day.”

Shameka C Carter

“Hello, my name is Shameka Carter, I am a single parent with three children. My oldest son is eighteen years old, my daughter is sixteen years old and my youngest son is eleven years old. When I was diagnosed with SLE in 2017 I did not tell my children right away. I always kept my health issues away from them because I didn’t want them to worry. It was bad enough that I had Crohn’s Disease along with many others and they would see I was in a lot of pain; in and out of the hospital because of my flares and heart issues. Yes, I have many things going on with my health, but when I finally told my children about my health issues, it was mainly because the changes with my health began to come rapidly. The hair loss, pain, my daughter witnessing and asking questions, in and out of the hospital more than usual. Not coming home for being admitted to the hospital. One of my biggest fears was knowing my bestfriend lost her battle with lupus and was also my children’s godmother. That was very heart breaking for my children and as well myself dealing with her passing (May She RIP). I did not want them to think I was going to die too, they began to think I was going to die just like their godmother. I began having weekly meetings with them to discuss their feelings and things they had been going on in their lives. Comfortability was my goal, they shared there feelings and emotions and I did the same. I would update them on everything that was going on bu.t I still managed to keep it to a minimum. It started to become hard because I began to have days where I would pass out in my and my children would have to call the ambulance. There were times I was unconscious could not and had not a clue what was going on. I created a medical list that I keep in my purse and copies in a folder where my children had access to in case they certain information. The lists includes everything about me, all my medications and correct dosages, how often I take the medicine, my diagnosis, surgeries. I made sure to include all my doctors and their information, locations, phone numbers, fax number the doctors specialty. I also included all medication allergies and reactions on the list as well. As for taking care of my children, household, and health, it is a whole task within itself. It becomes draining, (Yes, my children are not babies) but do not get it confused I love my children. Sometimes I find it to be a burden oldest two children because sometimes they feel the need to be the caregivers to their little brother and myself. I do not like that because I just want my children to focus on their education, goals and just be good hearted people. It is okay for them to help me from time to time but I want them to enjoy their lives. My children absolutely have daily chores that they are required to complete. One thing for sure is, I do not want to them to think that taking care of me is one of their chores. Sometimes I feel that and it breaks heart. My children are my driving force through my health battles and if it was not for my children I would not have been able to survive thus far. My children are my purpose and one of the reasons I became a self published author of four books and named my first book, “My Children Saved My Life” With God’s Grace And Mercy. Everything happens for a reason in life and we will have our moments to no understanding. Time passes and then you have that light bulb moment where you remember and realize why certain things happen, just the universe. God showing us our own way. To all those here, I wish you much Prosperity, Clarity, Health, Wealth, & many Blessings. Smile as much as you can. It eases the soul some.”